Even During Quarantine A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood Was Unwatchable

Tom Hanks in A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood. Image courtesy of Sony Pictures.

When I first heard they were making a Mr. Rogers film starring Tom Hanks, I was rather ambivalent but it got kind of good reviews and Saving Mr. Banks wasn’t that bad so as I settled in for some social distancing under the threat of imminent Corona-related death, I thought I’d at least give it a chance. From the opening moments of this movie, however, I realized I had made a truly terrible mistake.

I don’t really like biopics generally, but I was informed by critics that this wasn’t really about Mr. Rogers but about the journalist who interviewed him for an Esquire profile in 1998, a bitter, angry man whose soul is somehow soothed by Mr. Rogers’ implacable kindness and decency. Sure, that sounded kind of Movie of the Weeky and treacly, but again, these are desperate times so who knows, sometimes that kind of Degrassi fare can still be palatable if it’s well-made.

But from top to bottom there is nothing well-made about this film, except for maybe the way it uses some cool miniatures for establishing shots. But the casting of Tom Hanks as Mr. Rogers was probably the most horrendous mistake. He’s terrible in the role, as he tries to land an impression but can’t do it. If the Mr. Rogers of this movie is meant to be a calm and bottomless pool of wisdom and kindness, then it failed – because he comes off as an off-kilter creepy pod person. Hanks is not up to the task of carrying this film, and that is a fatally weak link.

Frankly, the movie is just terrible. Coincidentally, so was the Esquire article it is based on. I dug it up and got about four paragraphs in when I had to stop because it just tries to choke you with weird sentiment. So it is not really a surprise that the film based on it is one of the worst I think I have ever seen and that anyone found anything remotely positive to recommend about this film makes me really wonder about the persistence of humans as a viable species on Earth. I mean, I am currently trapped inside my house with nothing to do (not even any internet, thanks to the observance of the Balinese Day of Silence) and I still couldn’t make it through this turgid pile of self-immolating weirdity.